Let’s talk about communication. Or more accurately—miscommunication.
I get a lot of calls that start like this:
“My client—or the other agent—just turned into a demon.”
(You know who you are.)
My first question is always:
“How are you communicating with them?”
Text? Email? Phone? Smoke signal?
Because how you say something—and the method you use to communicate—often matters more than what you’re actually saying.
I’ve learned this the hard way. I had an ongoing issue with someone where every email felt like a landmine and a hostile battle. But in person or on the phone? Different story. We weren’t actually mad—we were just speaking different languages.
Text? Zero tone, no body language, and one too many capital letters can make it sound like you’re screaming. And let’s be honest—no one wants to scroll through a 12-paragraph text. If you have that much to say, pick up the phone or send an email.
Phone calls? Helpful, but risky if emotions are already running hot. People get bold when they’re not looking you in the eye. And let’s just say… manners tend to evaporate.
Email? Useful, but easy to misread—especially if someone’s in a rush, stressed, or not a strong communicator. A small emoji 😊 or a softer tone can keep things human.
And let’s not forget: Not responding—waiting until you “feel like it”—can do just as much damage. Silence feels dismissive. It breeds frustration.
Generational styles matter too. What feels normal to you might come off as cold, aggressive, or passive to someone else.
And yes, sometimes people really do act like demons and may need an exorcism. No method fixes that—unless you’re an exorcist. In those moments, take a breath, stay professional, and remember—the high road has better views.
So if you’re in a tense exchange, pause.
Ask: Is the way I’m communicating helping—or hurting?
Then shift. And respond.
Because in our business, silence isn’t always golden. It can be gasoline. Sometimes, a well-placed emoji, a phone call, or an in-person meeting is all it takes to put the fire out.