I just finished a truly great memoir called Into the Magic Shop by Dr. James “Jim” Doty, and it has officially made its way into my top five favorite books. It made me cry, reflect and deeply touched my soul. More than anything, it gave me hope for humanity and restored my belief in the beauty of people’s hearts.

Doty grew up very poor in an incredibly dysfunctional family. His father was an angry alcoholic, his mother battled severe depression, and as a child, Jim witnessed her attempt suicide multiple times. His home was chaotic, uncertain and, at times, ugly.

Then, at 12 years old, he wandered into a magic shop looking for a plastic thumb – you know, the kind magicians use to make things disappear.

Instead, he met Ruth.

Ruth was the mother of the shop’s owner, and she took the time to really see him. She saw his light and decided to teach him some real magic.

Over the course of that summer, she taught Jim how to relax his body, quiet his mind, open his heart and imagine a different future for himself.

And he did.

Doty became a neurosurgeon and achieved things that 12-year-old boy could barely have imagined. Success. Money. Recognition. At one point, he became incredibly wealthy, living right here in Newport Beach.

You would think that was the magic.

But it wasn’t.

Somewhere along the way, he became so focused on achieving the life he had imagined that he forgot one of Ruth’s most important lessons: open your heart.

Eventually, Jim lost much of what he had built, and through that loss learned something success hadn’t taught him: getting what you want and becoming who you are supposed to be are not necessarily the same thing.

We spend so much of our lives focused on the next thing. The sale. The house. The relationship. The balance in the bank account. When I get there, then I’ll be happy. Then I’ll feel successful.

But maybe the real magic is learning to quiet the noise long enough to understand why we want those things in the first place.

Personal growth isn’t always becoming more successful or accomplished. Sometimes it’s becoming softer. More aware. More compassionate. More grateful. Sometimes it’s realizing the person you become while chasing the goal matters more than the goal itself.

A 12-year-old boy walked into a magic shop looking for a trick and instead found a woman who saw him, invested her time in him and changed the course of his life.

Never underestimate what really seeing someone, believing in them and giving them your time can do.

The magic was never really in the shop. Ruth was simply teaching Jim how to find what had been inside him all along.

Turns out, that’s where most of the good stuff is hidden anyway. In your heart.